The Look of Love
by Panda Slippers
Summary: Two months after the festival in Idris, Jace takes Clary on their first date. Semi-related to a previous one-shot, Just A Little Lovin. Fluff!


**READ THIS**: Ok, so this is sort of AU-ish. Jace and Clary did have their little heart to heart in Idris, but let's say it wasn't to the exact extent that it was in the book. It was made clear that they both are insanely important to each other, and that they want to be together – but "love" wasn't exchanged quite yet. The dialogue at the end may mimic the dialogue in COG, but I didn't follow it exactly on purpose! Also, let's assume that they came back to New York, because I don't know if I like them staying in Idris.

This was inspired by Shelby Lynn's cover of Dusty Springfield's "The Look of Love". Both versions of the song are great, and if you don't know it, you might want to listen to it before you read this. This same cd inspired my earlier one-shot "Just a Little Lovin".

The response I got to "Just a Little Lovin" was insane! I've never gotten that kind of response from one of my stories before; the reviews were incredibly sweet and the amount of people that added it to their favorites list floored me. Thank you so much! Unless you are a fellow author, I cannot tell you how much of a rush it is to get reviews – it's like heroin. Er, I would assume. Not that I have any personal experience. Really!

Right. After that bit of ecstatic gratitude and awkwardness, let's move on, shall we?

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Jace, Clary or anything related to The Mortal Instruments trilogy except a copy of the series. Nor do I own any sort of rights to "The Look of Love". All I own is half dozen candles, which are currently lit, my insanely comfy bed upon which I now sit, and the glass of wine in my hands.

* * *

Clary climbed the steps nervously. Which, really, was ridiculous – they were together now. There was nothing to be nervous about. Except the fact that this was their first date. Not counting the celebration in Idris or the night of her birthday (which she decided not to). Not only was it _their_ first date, it was _her_ first date too. Her first date and she was already in love with the guy. Not how it normally goes, right?

Clary sighed. Therein lay the problem. Clary was certain she was in love with Jace; she'd never been surer about anything in her entire life. Jace, however….well, she knew that he cared for her a great deal. He had made that much clear on the steps back in Idris. But he never said that he _loved_ her. Just that she was the most important thing to him, and– as far as he was concerned – they were tied together and that his feelings for her made him stronger. It was enough to make her slightly dizzy by how fast her heartbeat whenever she thought about it.

After the celebrations had died down, Simon had gone back to New York with her mom and Luke. Her mother was reluctant to leave Clary after having been reunited with her, but Luke imparted upon her the importance of letting Clary make her own decisions. So Clary decided to stay in Idris with the Lightwoods, and with Jace. It didn't take more than a few days to realize that as wonderful a place as Idris was, it didn't feel like home, and Clary missed home. The Lightwoods, too, were eager to be away from the place that now held so many bad memories, and go back to the place where they had good memories of Max. A little over a week after the celebrations were over, Clary, Jace and the Lightwoods returned to New York – Jace and the Lightwoods to the Institute, and Clary to Luke's.

Life didn't quite go back to normal. Clary and Simon started school again (with a little help from Magnus to smooth things over), but Clary also had her Shadowhunter training. Alec, Isabelle and Jace had taken to teacher her all that she was so far behind in learning. They started off going easy on her, which Clary did not appreciate. After a few days of the rather soft treatment she yelled at them to stop treating her special. "Demons aren't going to go easy on me when we're fighting, so you shouldn't either!" Her bruise covered body screamed at her that night as she soaked in a hot bath. She soon started proving her inborn ability, learning maneuvers and skills essential to Shadowhunters. Alec started to become a mentor to her, seeing in her a bit of him: her constant need to prove her worth as a valuable warrior. With his help, Clary started to hone her skills and was now starting to feel confident in calling herself a Shadowhunter.

By the time they were through their daily training (which came after a full day of mundie school for Clary) she was exhausted and the only thing she wanted was her bed. This was probably the reason why she and Jace had yet to really spend any alone time together. The few brief moments they were able to snatch up were quickly consumed with kissing and making up for all the lost time.

Yesterday, however, Jace had stopped her before she was leaving and pulled her to the side. "I realized that, despite everything… we haven't _really_ gone out yet." Clary's heart beat faster at the tender look he was giving her. "Tomorrow night, 9 o'clock, in the greenhouse. Sound good?" Jace shot her one of those smiles that had always made her knees a little bit weak, so Clary could only nod her assent.

This is what brought Clary climbing the stairs to the greenhouse in a clingy but soft black top that showed off more of her shoulders than she was accustomed to and a white skirt that floated just above her knees (an outfit picked out by Isabelle when a frantic Clary showed up at her bedroom door earlier that day). It was decidedly more feminine than Clary was used to, but somehow she still felt slightly comfortable, and she was grateful for that bit of comfort that was given. The reason for her nerves was clear to her, beyond the nerves of a first date: did Jace _love_ her? She couldn't exactly come right out and ask. After much consideration in the past few weeks, she had decided to simply tell him how she felt, and hope that similar sentiments followed.

As Clary rounded the last few steps and came upon the greenhouse, her breath hitched in her throat. It was just like the night of her 16th birthday, but so much better. A couple dozen candles of various height placements lit a blanket on the floor, upon which a takeout box from Taki's sat. The vanilla scent from the candles melded with the greenhouse's natural heavy floral aroma, making Clary a little dizzy. As she slowly spun around to take it all in, Jace stepped out from the shadows playing with a lighter.

"Well?" he asked. "Was it what you were expecting?" His tone was filled with his usual arrogance, but Clary could detect the faint traces of self-consciousness floating around his words.

"Considering I had no idea what to expect – no. It's not what I was expecting." Jace stiffened slightly before Clary walked over to him, and took his hand. "Of all the places we could have gone, and all of the things we could have done, I'm really, really happy we're here." Clary brushed her mouth against his.

Jace led Clary to the blanket and they situated themselves so that they sat perpendicular to each other. Jace opened the take out containers and started distributing the food, while Clary played with her utensils. Jace noticed her nervous movements, and put his hand on hers, stopping the anxious fidgeting. "Hey." He flashed her another one of those knee-weakening smiles.

Clary felt her nerves start to calm as she smiled back at him. "Hey, yourself." She accepted the plate Jace handed to her, and laughed lightly to herself. At Jace's questioning look, she said, "I just can't believe we're actually doing this. We've been together for almost two months, and we're just now having our first date."

"I know, and I'm sorry. But I tend to get…distracted around you." Jace gave her a wolfish grin, which caused Clary to blush from what felt like head to toe. She laughed and punched him in the shoulder for good measure. The uncertain atmosphere broke, and the two settled into the comfortable place they always had together.

Throughout dinner Clary and Jace talked with ease. They talked about Clary's classes, Jace ragged on Simon (although at this point it was purely in good humor as the two had started to develop an understanding – and possibly even the foundation of friendship), and they discussed Isabelle's new boy toy. There were no moments of awkward silences or searching for a topic to discuss. After Idris, everything about their relationship was easy. Talking and laughing was easy. Kisses were definitely easy. Unfortunately, fighting was also fairly easy. Both Clary and Jace had very explosive and stubborn personalities, and were constantly adjusting to the other. Luckily, making up was also easy.

They ate leisurely, in no hurry to speed up the end of the night. Candle wax had started to drip over the floor of the greenhouse by the time they were finished with dinner. Jace stood and walked towards a stereo that was semi-hidden in the brush. He pressed play, and Clary was surprised to hear what she recognized as Dusty Springfield – one of her mom's favorite painting music. He slowly strolled back, stopping when he was less than a foot away. He held out his hand with a flourishing bow and with eyes sparkling in mischief asked, "May I have this dance?" Clary giggled and accepted the outstretched hand. Jace pulled her close to him, his hands on her waist and her hands around his neck.

As they swayed to the music, Clary felt completely serene. Jace's smile went wider and he rested his forehead against hers. "I love seeing you like this. So calm, so…happy." Clary's eyes brightened, and Jace's voice roughened. "You are so beautiful." He leaned down and pressed his lips firmly against hers. Clary gasped lightly and moved her hands to play with the hair on the nape of his neck as he slowly pulled away. "Has this been ok for your first date?" Clary looked startled at this piece of information. "Isabelle told me; and told me not to fuck it up."

Clary looked into his shining eyes. "Yes, thank you Jace. This was perfect." Clary felt like she was under a spell. The music weaved between them, keeping them in a trance. The flickering candlelight made Jace look more angelic than normal. The air was heavy with the perfume of the flora around them. And the way Jace was looking at her…

"I love you." Clary had made no conscious decision to whisper those words, but they came out nonetheless.

Jace stiffened and stopped swaying, his arms tightening around her waist. His eyes looked directly into hers, almost urging her to say it again. So she did. "I love you, Jace. I think I've loved you since my birthday when you first took me up here. When you kissed me…I had never felt so alive. Every nerve ending was tingling and I wasn't sure I would be able to stand much longer. My heart broke when I thought you were my brother. I was so lost. And that day at Taki's, when you told me you were going to be a good brother to me…I came there to tell you that I was in love with you. But you said you wanted to be my brother, so I thought maybe you had changed your mind about me." Clary felt the floodgates crumbling as everything poured out. She tore her eyes from his. "When you died…Jace, I couldn't breathe. The only thing I could even think to ask the Angel for was you. Nothing else mattered. There was nothing else on earth I wanted. Every day that we've been together has been more than I ever imagined I would have. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up, and all this will have been a dream."

She took a deep breath and looked into his eyes. "I was always that cute, weird girl on the fringe. But then you look at me, and I'm different. The way you look at me…takes my breath away. No one has ever looked at me the way you do. My heart pounds and my head gets cloudy. You make me feel beautiful, and vibrant, and _special_. The way you look at me makes me feel like I'm the most important person in the world. You make me feel strong, and every look shows how much faith and belief you have in me. You look at me that way _every time _you look at me. When you look at me that way it just reinforces, _every time_, how much I'm in love with you."

Jace closed his eyes together and Clary became afraid she had made a horrible mistake. His eyes opened, and they shown brighter than Clary had ever seen them, as if an inner sun was shining through. He pulled her to his so there was no space between their bodies, brought his mouth down to hers, and kissed her with fierce, blinding passion. When he finally broke away they were both breathing heavily, gasping for air. He brushed his lips against hers once, twice, three times with the utmost delicacy and Clary had never felt her heart beat faster.

"I told you that day in Idris that since the moment I first saw you, I belonged to you Clarrisa Fray. When I first met you, I thought you were weak, naive. I was taught that love was a weakness, and that to love someone only gave you a point of destruction. Yet here you were, fighting because you loved your mom, Luke, even Simon. That love gave you strength, gave you courage, and gave you purpose. I realized that I was the one how was weak." Clary tried to interrupt him and disagree, but Jace drove forward.

"Valentine knew how I felt about you – he used you as a way to get to me. The idea that you were my _sister_ tortured me in ways I can never explain. Yet it never felt real. You were a part of me, yes – that was undeniable – but my _blood_? I told you it felt like some sick, cosmic joke. How could the universe, how could _God_, allow this to happen? I find the one person who I'm willing to give everything to, in a way I hadn't let myself since," Jace faltered for a moment, "since I thought my father died, and she's the one person I'm not supposed to love." Clary stopped breathing at the first sound of _love_.

"When I fought Valentine, the one thing that I could think of was you. Thinking of you made me strong. I wanted to come back, for you; but I died." Jace shook his head, and his voice lowered to a whisper as he placed his hands on either side of Clary's face, holding her as if she were the most precious thing he'd ever known. "You could have asked the Angel for anything, Clary. But you asked for me." Jace's voice was full of wonder as he looked down at her, his eyes caressing her skin. "You helped me when I was lost and didn't know who I was, or what family I belonged to."

Jace's eyes searched Clary's before his mouth once again descended to hers. The kiss was soft and gentle, but Clary could feel every bit of heart that Jace was putting into it. She responded in kind, standing on her toes to have more ownership in the kiss. Jace ended the kiss and rested his forehead against hers, playing with the hair around her face. Jace glowed, and Clary couldn't help but think of the blinding, inhuman light the Angel Raziel chasing away the darkness of the night. "I love you, Clarissa Fray. You are the most important person to me – ever. I am yours for as long as you want me, and even when you don't. Loving you has given me strength, courage and purpose. You talk about the way I look at you. I look at you that way because I love you; because my heart is consumed with you. And I will look at you that way until the last breath has left my body, and when it does, my soul will be waiting for yours."

Tears ran silently down Clary's cheeks at Jace's confession. How was it possible that this beautiful man felt so strongly about her? Jace was the most amazing, dynamic, passionate person she had ever met. _And he loved her._ Clary felt an overwhelming wave of love for this man in front of her. She tightened her arms around his neck and threw herself into a searing kiss. Even after the kiss broke an eternity later, the two still clung to each other, clasped in an unbreakable embrace. Clary couldn't stop muttering "I love you" into Jace's chest, and with each delivery Jace hugged her tighter.

Only the sound of Isabelle alerting them to demon activity (via a spell courtesy of Magnus) broke the two apart. Clary couldn't wipe the smile off her face. "Best first date ever, Lightwood."

Jace brushed Clary's cheek with the back of his hand, with a smile that outshone the full moon. "Last first date ever, Fray."

* * *

This took forever. I was completely stop-and-go in writing this. I'm realtivly happy with how this turned out, especially since I've never done Jace dialogue before – so please excuse me if he's a little out of character.

PLEASE REVIEW! Even if it's telling me what a crappy job I did, hearing from y'all is almost as good as a kiss from Jace. :P

I have another MI fic in the works…but we'll see how fast I get that up. No promises! Lol.

Happy Reading!

P.S.


End file.
